
Each and every one of you is affected by rape.
As I write this, my heart beats faster, my palms sweat. It’s unexpected. I thought that having dealt with my own experience of rape and spoken and written about it over so many years, this would be more of the same. It isn’t.
Because I want to bring home to you that YOU, yes you, as you read this, are affected by rape. If not through knowing a victim, then by way of the shameful statistics in this country.
If you don’t know me personally, or don’t know, or know of, someone who has been through the horror, then you have a daughter, a sister, a mother whom you worry about. YOU ARE TOUCHED BY RAPE.
- South Africa has the highest instances of (reported) rape in the world!
- 75% of (reported) rape in South Africa is gang rape.
- 41% of those (reported) raped are under the age of 12.
- In Meadowlands, Soweto, police say 90 percent of rape in that community is against children younger than 12.
- In 2004, 50% of cases before the South African courts were for rape (National Prosecuting Authority)
- It is estimated that only 1 in 20 rapes is ever reported!
(statistics supplied by nationmaster.com, sundayindependent.co.za and the Centre for the Study of Violence and Reconciliation)
We’ve all heard these statistics over and over again. As a society, we’ve become complacent. It’s easier to distance ourselves, after all, rape has become a part of daily news broadcasts and talk show chats, but what you may not know is:
Besides the pain of having to relay exactly the details of what happened to her, and the indignity of having to submit to an intimate physical examination, rape survivors have to leave their panties and whatever else they are wearing (e.g. shorts, jeans, skirt etc) with the District Surgeon.
Last year, the Jes Foord Foundation in Durban started the Handbag Project. This has been a huge success and after having spoken to Jes, I have decided that Soul Circle will take up this project in Gauteng.
We are putting together Pamper Packs for rape survivors. We are asking you for good condition handbags/backpacks (i.e. one you no longer use or one you may have received as a gift but will never use.) Not only ladies handbags, but children’s and men’s backpacks too, as it is not only women who are raped.
The bags will be given to the survivors and will contain different products that have been identified by trauma staff as what they are most in need of, including panties, feminine hygiene products, toothpaste, tooth brushes, hair brushes, clips, deodorant, face clothes, hand towels, soap, body lotion, shampoo, lip ice, a snack (granola bar, energy bar etc.) juice, notepad and pen.
Jes also suggested a little gift e.g. when Mr Price has their sales, buy some earrings, a bracelet or whatever you feel would be a ‘light’ at this awful time.
Anything to make them feel special!
For children you can include:
- Nappies
- Small cuddly toy
- Bubble bath
As per Jes Foord’s original project, THE MOST IMPORTANT FEATURE IN THIS HANDBAG IS:
Please would each of you write a note to the survivor. It can be a few words or an essay but something from your heart to theirs.
For example, even if you write something like “No matter what has happened you are special, and please don’t let anyone take that away from you. You can, and will, get through this. There are so many people who really care and will help you gain your strength. This gift is given to you with love from (your name)”.
When you are at your lowest, just receiving the bag with all the goodies, a simple gift, can give you hope, and hope is a fundamental step in recovery.
Give as much or as little as you are able, even if it’s a single, sample bottle of shampoo. Every little bit helps and the bags will be made up from everyone’s donations.
Anyone who can help with the pamper packs can contact me via email or on 082 828 2565, or drop donations off at my office, weekdays between 08h30 and 12h30
Virago Consulting 16 Sunrise Centre Cnr van Riebeek Ave and Hendrick Potgieter Edenvale







Most people live and die with their music still unplayed. They never dare to try.
I figure that if the children are alive when I get home, I’ve done my job.~ Roseanne



I came across the following a few months ago and thought I’d share it here. It’s certainly food for thought.